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Cherry Berry b/w Yrreb Yrrehc

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One of the great things about having an online distribution partner is when they take the initiative and upload catalogue tracks to YouTube in (in this case, optimistic) hopes of click-through streaming royalties.

Sometimes, though, the results are unexpected.

Yrreb Yrrehc

Provided to YouTube by The Orchard Enterprises Yrreb Yrrehc · Dan Bryk · Tha Commissioners Cherry Berry ℗ 2006 Dan Bryk Released on: 2014-06-03 Music Publisher: Dan Bryk Auto-generated by YouTube.

I forgot all about the B-side to Cherry Berry until someone emailed me asking if this was for real. (That person is apparently the ONE listener thus far.)

The idea was utterly, unapologetically ripped off from the flip of Napoleon XIV’s “They’re Coming To Take Me Aaway, Ha-Haaa!” (I mean, they are both novelty songs fronted by pseudonymous authority figures, right?)

VIX Noelopan- !Aaah- ah yawa em ekat ot gnimoc’re yeht

B- Seite der Single “They’re coming to take me away, ha- haaa!” von Napoleon XIV

If you have no idea what any of this is about, there’s this:

Love In an Elevator

Okay, this is easily the single greatest song ever written about a state commissioner of labor. Yep, the smiling face of North Carolina Labor Commissioner Cherie K. Berry has inspired a song. A really funny song. Actually, just a great song altogether.


“Moneylenders Out!”

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This is without a doubt the best political essay I’ve read in ages, polemic or not. It crystallizes the issues with sharp and hilarious lines reminiscent of Taibbi or Bai or hell, Thomas Frank.

If Millennials are coming out in droves to support Bernie Sanders, it’s not because we are tripping balls on Geritol. No, Sanders’s clever strategy of shouting the exact same thing for 40 years simply strikes a chord among the growing number of us who now agree: Washington is bought. And every time Goldman Sachs buys another million-dollar slice of the next American presidency, we can’t help but drop the needle onto Bernie’s broken record:

The economy is rigged.

Democracy is corrupted.

The billionaires are on the warpath.

Sanders has split the party with hits like these, a catchy stream of pessimistic populism. Behind this arthritic Pied Piper, the youth rally, brandishing red-lettered signs reading “MONEYLENDERS OUT.”

And despite being a proud, self-identified millennial (imagine that!) it’s not even all about her. Mostly. So why are you still here and not already reading this thing?

Feeling the Yern: Why One Millennial Woman Would Rather Go to Hell Than Vote for Hillary

Stumping for Hillary Clinton this weekend in New Hampshire, hedge fund manager Madeleine Albright squawked, “There’s a special place in Hell for women who don’t help each other.” When the Democratic National Committee chair, Debbie Wasserman Schultz, was asked earlier this year why she thought Millennials resist Hillary Clinton, she…

Apple Music: Why does it got to be so damn tough?

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First, the search engine is awful. For example, I woke up singing Eddy Grant’s “I Don’t Wanna Dance” and thought “Gee, I’d like to hear that. And I wouldn’t mind playing Henry Electric Avenue or Give Me Hope Johanna either.”
So I searched for “Eddy Grant” and started off with this page of gobbledygook:
Screen Shot 2016-02-10 at 8.23.53 AM
5% of which appear to be “original artist” albums (none of which resemble the original album covers), followed by 45% cheap-looking soundalike records (sure, the Caribbean and especially Jamaica are famous for their scale of bootlegging, but doesn’t famously fastidious and litigious Apple have ANY quality control over their content? If not, at least over ranking?)  The remainder appear to be single tracks on multiple-artist compilations, yet interspersed between those are Eddy Grant or Equals (his original group) releases of potential interest. Trust me, it goes on for another page.
 
The best part, though, is noting Anal C*nt‘s “Everyone Should Be Killed” smack dab in the middle of the ranking. Turns out AC has a song called “Eddy Grant” (which loosely resembles “Electric Avenue” yet is nowhere near as funny as “I’m Not Allowed to Like AC anymore since they signed to Earache” or “Song Titles Are F**king Stupid.”) Apple’s search engine isn’t even sophisticated enough to exclude it from my ALBUM search.
 
So while I am sure ICE (Grant’s original label) and Sony (North American licensee) are probably more to blame for Apple Music’s lack of decent releases than Apple is, it does lead one to question — couldn’t Apple have at least one person on staff to browse through the notable artists and make sure they have at least one legitimate, half-decent catalogue best-of? And if not, present the label(s) with a laundry list. If Apple Music is being sold as a best-of-class product, it needs quality catalogue.
I already feel guilty enough for likely reducing the short-term income streams of the artists I like (though I still reflexively buy/download records by the ones I LOVE — it certainly helps when I know they are their own label or work with fair, equitable partners) so why add all this UX friction to the mix?
And could Apple PLEASE poach a few people from Google Search to improve their search engine? (There’s no excuse for how weak iOS App search is, either.)

Pop Up Chorus sings She’s An Angel

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I almost forgot about taking part in Durham’s delightfully eclectic Pop Up Chorus a few years back, gleefully conducted by my old peep (and Pop Psychology hornsmith) Seamus Kenney. I never actually make it on camera (look for my striped blue short sleeve shirt from behind) but you can definitely hear me in there. It was a great time, but the next morning I got a brutal kidney stone. Damn you, salty delicious barbecue.

PopUp Chorus sings “She’s An Angel” by They Might Be Giants

“She’s An Angel” by They Might Be Giants, recorded on Monday, April 28, 2014, at Motorco in Durham, North Carolina. PopUp Chorus is held on Monday nights at Motorco in Durham, NC, and is brought to you by Community Chorus Project, founded by Lauren Bromley Hodge.

 

An open letter to Bernie Sanders.

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Dear Bernie Sanders:
 
I love you, man. I love what you represent. I admire your directness and dissatisfaction with the status quo. I respect you for financing your campaign without superpac/soft/dark money.
 
However, six or seven straight days of begging fundraising emails is enough. If you have something new and interesting to say, let me know. But please don’t fill my inbox with one-paragraph, content-free, bullshit “updates” — likely composed by some mid-level apparatchik but signed with your name — followed by three fundraising paragraphs.
 
That, dear friend I’ve never met, is called American politics as usual.
 
It pains me to remind you that we, the people — your supporters — are NOT an ATM to be withdrawn from at will. I imagine the demands of campaigning can make even the best-intentioned candidate forget this. But I will assure you a weekly fundraising email will deplete my political spending budget quite nicely, thank you.
 
Now go on and win it all you crazy diamond!
 
Love,
Dan Bryk

The Definite Article

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Played pianorgan on this sweet little King Radio song not long before my dad passed away. Not a song about grammar.

Definite Article

King Radio: The Definite Article Frank Padellaro: guitar and lead vocal, Paul Pelis: drums, Rob Cook: bass, Lee Flier: lead guitar, Dan Bryk: organ and piano, Brandi Ediss: backing vocal and vocal arrangements, Diana Chadwell Brown: backing vocal, Matt Brown: backing vocal, Bob Fenster: backing vocal, Lee Wiggins: tambourine.

Brike? Brick? Bryke? Bryck?

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LOL after nearly three decades of hearing my name mangled every which way (my favorite being that Chicago Tower Records header card that read “David Bryck”) the bit that starts at 37:00 means an awful lot to me.

TAP #1.02: If It Feels Good Do It – A Sloan Tribute (pt. 1)

Welcome to the all-new Theme Artist Podcast, where we’ll feature honest-to-god record releases from fellow Theme People! This episode is about Futureman Records release If It Feels Good Do It – A Sloan Tribute and the many Themesters contained therein!

 

Article 2


All Wikidding aside

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How, exactly, does one solicit Wikipedians to update one’s Wikipedia entry? Is there a dark web where one leaves offerings of Chocodiles and Samwell Tarly fanfic in exchange for accuracy, if not flattery?

I hesitate to edit myself lest my neutrality or hell, notability be called into question. However, friends and complete strangers think I still live in Dar Es Salaam.

Let’s see… I’ve been back in the states since 2014, living in Durham NC for almost a year now. I’m doing very well under the circumstances. I will have some new music out there sooner than you’d expect and later than you think.

You’re welcome!

Oops.

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Just an awkward reminder: you are often only a degree or two of separation from the object of your opinion.

Songwriting Questions… from a decade ago.

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So I found this 2008 Word .doc on an external dump drive while hunting for a scan of an old, never-finished song. The file is dated May 17, 2008. I have no memory of which writer or publication even asked these questions–no hint in the file either–but never mind. I have a feeling this probably never even made it off my desktop.

In hindsight, I certainly take back my natterings about Lou Reed, though. The callousness of youth and all that. (R.I.P. Lou, may you find the rest you were denied here.) And I’ve certainly made my peace with I-IV-II-V, so long as there’s a solid supporting argument for it.

SONGWRITER QUESTIONS FOR DAN BRYK

What comes first; lyrics or melodies?

It depends. Melodies, if I’m sitting at the piano “trying to write a song.”  Words generally come any time a pen and notepad aren’t handy: falling asleep… driving in the car… in a meeting at work… post-coitus or worse, during. Awkward!

Are there any times in particular more fertile to the process? A couple of artists have told me that long solo drives tend to be particularly fertile….

I used to write a lot while driving, but I burned out the compact flash card in my old-school Olympus portacorder and I’ve been too lazy to hunt down a 16MB CF card. I’m really not good at writing while driving. I guess I could just buy a new note recorder (which might even have Mac OS X-friendly USB), but it was one of the first things I bought after moving to the Triangle (yaay Capital Pawn) and besides it’s the principle of the thing. We accept enough planned obsolescence as it is.

Influences – crib from them, or try to ignore them?

Wherever possible. Pop songwriting is a magpie’s art. I remember Nick Lowe saying something to the effect of “good artists borrow, great artists steal.” Or maybe it was “I steal, but I steal from the best.”  Hopefully the overall effect is more like Rauschenberg than say, Puff Daddy looping 8 bars of “Every Breath You Take” over and over and calling it your own.

First song you ever wrote – title? Theme?

“Please Please Please Lord.”  I believe it had something to do with asking God for a girlfriend. This was even before I got sent to the principal’s office for playing the White Album on the art room cassette player. It’s hard to believe that even in 1982 Pentacostals still had a problem with that “bigger than Jesus” bit. It was someone’s birthday.

Influential songwriters (3-5) – what about them in particular?

Randy Newman – American Genius. No one skates between pop song and art with such finesse.

Aimee Mann – huge influence on my album “Lovers Leap”. She hasn’t done shit for me lately, but “I’m With Stupid” is still my Nevermind.

Leslie “Sam” Phillips – one of the smartest, deepest thinkers ever to wield a sharp pop hook. I’ve been a fan for 20 years, even when she was still considered a “Contemporary Christian” artist, and her last three albums are her best. She is so underrated, especially in indie music circles, it’s just stupid.

R.D. Burman – the late Bollywood composer. I have been devouring everything I can find of his since I bought a box set on a trip to India three years ago. An incredibly versatile composer, syncretic in the extreme, he mixes up Indian classical music and ragas and bollywood pop with all kinds of western sounds in brilliantly idiosyncratic arrangements—I hear everything from Bacharach to John Barry to ABBA in his music, but it’s still unmistakably his, and he wrote for all the great playback singers. Young Indian composers refer to him as L.O.R.D. for a reason.

Elliptical narratives, opaque imagery, or specificity?

Whatever works.  I’m not very good with descriptive detail, but I’ve been working on that. Some people find my lyrics hyper-specific, but those people probably hate Douglas Coupland too. I’ve tried to cut back on name-dropping consumer products when it’s clear they’re not going to underwrite my work. No-one told me about that Taco Bell “Feed the Band” contest, and that hurt.

Do you write for an album, or is each song an island?

I try and write good songs and hopefully I write enough of them to fill an album every year or two. I consider myself lazy if I can’t write 10 good songs a year, but then again inspiration’s for the lazy. Pretty soon I’m going to have to give up using immigration as an excuse for not finishing up my records. I’m fortunate in that Pop Psychology sort of has a grand theme, but it’s failure. People will only put up with one or two albums about failure in a row. Ask Mark Eitzel.

When do you know if you’re in a rut?

Dust on the piano.

Is it easier to take a personal event and tweak it to make more universal, or to take something completely fabricated and personalize it?

Dude, that’s a ten-point essay question! Unfortunately I, uh, tend to write from actual life experiences. I always sucked at creative writing in school, I was more into The New Journalism. Also I find unhappy or tense situations to provide more compelling narrative than when things are going smoothly. And I never tweak to make shit more universal. Put them all together = I still have a day job.

Artists from other writing mediums impress/affect? Poets, novelists, Raymond Carver?

Love me some Copywriters: Mary Wells, Bill Bernbach, Edward Graham, Ron Rosenfeld, Phyllis Robinson, Shirley Polykoff, David Ogilvy, (mmmm) George Lois. They made art out of the art of suggestion. Probably explains a lot.

What’s the longest you’ve ever tinkered with a song?

17 years. It’s called “Lowering The Standards” and it’s been almost done for maybe 5 years now. I just need to get the lyrics right in the bridge… it’ll be worth it, I swear.

What’s one thing that will turn you off instantly to a song on the radio (or the computer-ish equivalent)?

A I-IV-II-V chorus.  It’s like the “hit” algorithm. Every lame-ass pop punk song, every formulaic song the Matrix shits out… my ex-girlfriend referred to that chord progression as the “money chords.”

Also, auto-tuned lead vocals. Well, maybe I’ll make an exception for movie soundtracks when the actor is supposed to be singing. I’d rather hear Ewan McGregor and Nicole Kidman sing “Come What May” with a little help from Melodyne than some ringers with perfect pitch.

Dylan or Lennon?

Costello. It’s like the best of both worlds, without all that irritating myth and hagiography.

Lennon or McCartney?

There’s no point in choosing, no choice really. Their genius… it’s so ubiquitous you just have to accept it and try to work around it. It’s like picking between air and water.  It’s like… Falkner or Brion?

Lou Reed or Tom Waits?

I am so fucking sick of Lou Reed coasting on his laurels.  New York was his last good album (not counting ‘Drella, but that was half Cale anyhow) and I was in Grade 11 when that came out. GRADE 11.  Tom Waits still writes great songs, cuts great albums, plays great shows. Plus, Tom never shilled for Honda.

Stipe or Malkmus?

Pollard.

House Concert

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Dan Bryk – House Concert – Nov 2017

Bryk’s return to “performance” after seven years of child rearing “sabbatical.” Nearly all new songs, warts and all. Utterly unprofessional recording grabbed from FB Live but don’t worry, the camera gets adjusted upwards once the set starts. You’ve probably never heard songs quite like these.

I opened a house concert for my old friend and tourmate Michael Holt. This is the warts and all document, sneetched from Facebook Live. Super rough around the edges and straight from the heart. All new songs except for the opener and closer, this is “what I’ve been up to”, sort of.

Twenty Years of the Royal We

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It’s hard to believe.

From our humble, be-tilde’d beginnings at www.passport.ca/~sinatra we embraced the world wide webs whilst they gently, lovingly ensnared us like baffled houseflies savoring their first tantalizing whiff of vapona.

We partied with a sliver of that first big Mercury Records cheque and invested the rest in gear and rent, so grateful we could do this full time! No more day job for us.

We gasped as the best-intentions-cum-best-laid plans of Starjob Records collapsed into a PolyVersal morass of UniGram.

We paid some attorneys fees.

We adored those Laura Nyro bootlegs and obscure Dodgers sides and Coke Commercials and all the other amazing stuff that showed up unexpectedly on Napster and Soulseek and Gnutella et al. Everything is free now! We did not know we were sealing our own fate.

We grimaced as the economics of music-for-a-living quickly crashed and burned around us like the twin towers of arrogance and naivete they probably were.

We giggled as indie music became the domain of the family-free, mom-and-dad’s-COBRA-insured undergrad living above the garage. Look at us, we formed a band! Any teenager with a Macbook can make music, really there’s nothing to it! We can do this part-time! 

Then, we cried

Like a wind that’s always blowing
Life is flowing
Move on

 

No! Discs 1/8" page ad
Shot down in flames.

 

Someone Else’s Merch

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I designed a pledge drive T-shirt for Pseu Braun’s essential-listening Thing With a Hook radio show a while back and looks like they have the last few left for sale on the WFMU store. Now you can listener-support freeform radio and stealth brag for yours truly with one easy purchase!

Hook and Heart

Pseu’s Thing with a Hook’s Hook and Heart t-shirt. Can’t wear your pop heart on your sleeve? Put it on your chest! Designed by pop genius Dan Bryk. First time offered since 2014. Only 2 XXL left!

 

I live.

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So here it is, nearly a year later, and I find myself not only completing but now actually demoing a batch of troublesome tunes. Songwriter musicians tend to open new album press releases with statements to the effect that their new stuff is “the best they’ve ever written.” In all honesty, I seem to have as much ambivalence about this particular bunch as I have about any of my songs. Are my new songs great? Probably. Are they awful? Yes, that too. Surprisingly for myself, I have even broached those long-avoided, practically loathed themes of parenting and adulting in general.

Moments after I write a good song, I immediately wonder if I’ll ever write another one. And so far I have. But as they say, your car keys are always in the last place you find them.


Sssssh…

“He’s a Bryk”

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I remember the glimmer in Dave Celia’s eye before the gig years ago when he said almost conspiratorially “I hope you don’t mind, I have a song for you tonight, Bryk.” And then it showed up on his ace album This Isn’t Here and I basked in the glow of a first-rate takedown. Or compliment. Both, I think.

I stumbled onto Dave’s music around the turn of the millennium when by chance I stumbled across his band Invisible Inc. opening for someone else I’ve long forgotten. They were way more musicianly and classic rock-minded than the Queen Street indie crowd. I’d never heard anyone local (other than Swinghammer, or maybe Kevin Breit) play rock guitar with jazz fluidity and punk rock urgency, like Larry Carlton slumming with Steely Dan. Or something. All his songs weren’t quite there yet, you could still clearly pick off the influences, but his writing was way more ambitious than the new wave slackers and pub crawlers you would catch playing a thankless weeknight at C’est What.

Gently blown away, I introduced myself, (hopefully) bought him a drink, and soon realized we grew up barely a mile away in the shallow suburbs of Mississauga. He invited me over to his home studio and played me a bunch of songs that morphed into his first solo record Organica while my jaw kept dropping further with each song. I caught him every chance I could in the year or so before I departed on my great American misadventure, and I suppose my gratuitous tales of career success/failure/success/failure left an impression on him. Dave has worked much much harder at making an actual career of making music than I ever have, and when you hear him sing or even touch the strings, you’ll know it.

So it was double homecoming seeing Dave and Marla play last week. I love their duet record Daydreamers but didn’t realize they had re-recorded thisahem—my song together as a standalone single. Check it out. And then work your way backwards through their catalogues for some tremendous awesome.

I went all the way with a pumpkin.

Are the Pumpkins alright?

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Pumpkins, by john southworth

Pumpkins by john southworth, released 11 November 1996

Pumpkins

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Lordy, there are tapes

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As some of you probably know, I have Brontë lungs already weakened by a double-smoking-parent childhood followed a half-life of evenings spent in smoky clubs. Little known fact: I am also the wiktionary definition of the word sedentary. So I must confess I have sorta kinda been keeping an eye on this whole Coronavirus business. 

For the past two decades I have oscillated between writing some pretty good pop songs, recording them in various contexts, generally hating said recordings and/or my performances, and then not releasing, or occasionally banishing said songs from my thoughts. Self-deprecation and insecurity are hardly unique amongst songwriters (or artists, in general) but I had somehow managed to turn it into a ridiculous, crippling trail of unfinished business.

But then I lost a songwriter friend to the Trump Virus. On Tuesday I heard he was on a ventilator. Wednesday, he was gone. And I couldn’t help but feel that there was still this constellation of ideas, melodies, hooks, words there in his mind and suddenly they were GONE just like that, in an instant.

And also kind of like that, I realized that I need to stop taking this stuff quite so seriously. I need to stop needing things to be perfect or great (or as close as I ever get to that, though that’s another conversation) and just get on with the work with whatever time I have left on this planet.

So I’m going to empty my drawers and post one unreleased song a day, for the duration of the quarantine, or until they start to suck.

Free to a good home, starting with this one.

the elements of style, by dan bryk

the elements of style by dan bryk, released 05 April 2020

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